Saturday, February 14, 2009

The Angry Smile


I just finished The Angry Smile by Jody E Long, Nicholas J Long and Signe Whitson.
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This book defines, identifies and tells how to change passive-agression. "Passive aggression involves a variety of behaviors designed to get back at another person without the other recognizing the underlying anger. ...It is motivated by a person's fear of expressing anger directly." (pg 12)
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Section one is titled "What is Passive Aggression?" This part covers what passive aggression is, how it develops, reasons why people would use it and the five levels of passive aggression.
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In section two, "Identifying Passive Aggressive Behaviors" they show you how to identify passive aggressive behaviors in the home, at school, in families and at the workplace. There is the Covert Defiance is the one we see most often. This is where you might call your child or husband and they reply, "Coming!" but never do. This also involves temporary deafness and blindness among others.
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Section three, "Changing Passive-Aggressive Behaviors", they show you how to deal with yours or others passive aggression. "Passive aggression is not a one-person game but rather a match that is necessarily played out against an adversary." (pg 103)
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No matter where you are in life, this would be a valuable resource. It shows you how to deal with people in the work place that are passive aggressive. If you are passive aggressive yourself it shows you how to change some of your behaviors. It is important to recognize the signs and how to not engage in the passive aggressive cycle.
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This is an excellent reference book.
I give this a 5 out of 5.
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4 comments:

Salihah said...

I could use this book. Getting better after being raised in a passive-aggressive family, but more insight into myself always helps! I came across your blog through blogexplosion.com I enjoyed visiting!

Salihah

C said...

I think you will get a lot out of this book. I am passive aggressive (not as bad as I used to be) and it helped me out a lot.

I'm glad you enjoyed your visit. It's nice to know someone is getting something out of my posts!

Lucy P. said...

It wasn't until this post that I remembered some passive aggressive behaviors I did. I won't go into detail but being confrontational can be tough but it would've helped the situation better than "accidentily" deleting a friend's files.

C said...

I hear ya Lucy. I have a PA past for sure...this book was a real eye opener. It helped me recognize it and find a better way to handle things. I too hate confrontation, but when "accidents" happen I carry a LOT of guilt!